#431: What Are You?
Four personal stories about race and ethnicity
Last week’s issue on tradwife life caused a stir. One loyal reader wrote, “This is patriarchy and nothing’s changed.” Another wrote, “I'm pretty sure I'm a raging feminist, but as I read the articles this week, I wonder if there is something to explore here.” Still another argued that capitalism is the real problem. “The toxic relationship is not inherent to marriage itself or to seeing specific roles in the marital arrangement. Rather, one could argue that the true toxicity is found in the pursuit of self and monetary gain.” As always, thank you for reading and contributing your perspectives.
This week’s issue includes four personal pieces about race and ethnicity. I think you’ll find all of the essays worth your attention. But if you don’t have too much time, the lead article, “In Flux,” is a must-read, in my humble opinion. It’s so good, in fact, I might have to choose it for our article of the month coming up in March.
In addition to “In Flux,” I encourage you to read about:
how a microaggression leads a woman to ask if she is Black enough
how a woman hears regret and resilience in her Mexican grandfather’s songs
how a Filipina woman heals and recovers from being whitewashed
✏️ If you’re moved by any of these articles, please share your perspective. Feel free to email me. I’d be delighted to hear from you.
🎙️ There’s still time to sign up for our discussion this month of “Wider than the Sky,” by Phyllis Beckman. We’re meeting up on Sunday, Feb. 25 at 2 pm PT. There are a few spots left. Ms. Beckman’s essay is poignant and thought provoking — and extremely worthy of deep conversation with other kind, thoughtful people. Interested? All you need to do is sign up below. I’ll send you more details once you do.
1️⃣ In Flux
It begins with “What are you?” hollered from the perimeter of your front yard when you’re nine, younger probably. You’ll be asked again throughout junior high and high school, then out in the world. The askers are expectant. They demand immediate gratification. You immediately resent this question.
This is how Jonathan Escoffery begins “In Flux,” a phenomenal coming-of-age story about identity, belonging, and what it means to be Black. It’s technically a work of fiction, an excerpt from If I Survive You, nominated for the National Book Award. Though not strictly autobiographical, the piece feels true to Mr. Escoffery’s lived experience. Written in second person, it tells the story of an American boy, the son of Jamaican parents, who struggles to affirm his racial identity.
Depending on his context, the main character feels shame because he never fits in. Neighborhood kids want to know why his mom talks funny. When he asks his parents, “Am I Black?” they equivocate. At school his teachers wonder how he learned to speak so well. The Black kids on the playground find him befuddling.
“Somehow you keep falling short,” Mr. Escoffery writes. “How can your Blackness be so tenuous?”
By Jonathan Escoffery • Passages North • 38 min
2️⃣ Black Enough
After laughing off a microaggression from a white person, Christine Pride regrets her reaction. In this essay, Ms. Pride reflects on the shame she felt, wondering why she still experiences “racial impostor syndrom” and questions “the right way to be Black.” She recounts growing up in suburban Maryland, spending time with mostly white friends, and listening to Ani DiFranco and the Indigo Girls. Ms. Pride also shares “course correcting” in college: making a conscious decision to have only Black friends and wanting to prove she belonged. Despite coming from a long line of strong Black ancestors, “straight outta Alabama,” Ms. Pride says the struggle continues. She commits to living fully as herself, a Black woman.
I’m just gonna fully, wholly be myself and enjoy life, enjoy my rest, enjoy what I like, and not have to defend or prove it. I can’t let people limit me, white or Black. Instead of putting limitations and definitions on Blackness, which is playing into the hand of white supremacy in creating schisms between us for no real reason, we can all just be who we want and need to be.
By Christine Pride • Cup of Jo • 6 mins
3️⃣ My Grandfather’s Songs
Alondra Aguilar Rangel visits her grandfather, Papá José, every year over Christmas Break. He lives on the outskirts of Morelia, the capital of Michoacán, Mexico. He is a “reserved man,” she writes, with hair “now covered in white and his face in lines.” A working man of the countryside, Papá José prefers to share his feelings in song. He tells the story of the indignities he suffered when he immigrated to California as part of the Bracero program. He regrets leaving his family. He is sad his family has now left him. But Ms. Aguilar Rangel reminds us that in his songs, Papá José uses the verb “aguantar,” to endure. “We are constantly moving,” she writes, “living between different worlds, losing identities and creating new ones.”
By Alondra Aguilar Rangel • The Common • 10 mins • in English & Spanish
4️⃣ How Do I Recover From Being Whitewashed?
Growing up in Los Angeles in the 1990s, Filipina American
wanted to be white. She watched The Brady Bunch, Full House, 90210, and Friends. All the magazines she read had white women on every page. Except for The Joy Luck Club (not even Filipino) and the “2-second part with the one Asian friend in Clueless,” there were very few depictions of Asian characters in pop culture. In this well-written essay, Ms. Jucar Cooley, now a mother of two, reckons with her own internalized racism, including her family’s fascination with being light-skinned.I was whitewashed. Maybe I still am. But, unlike the skin whitening creams I was so offended by, I’ve decided there’s nothing to be fixed. Not my skin color, not my former self-loathing as a child, not my former feelings of my racial background, not even the lack of diversity in the books, art and pop culture of my childhood. I’m here today, a proud first-generation Filipino American and this pride is a culmination of everything I experienced and consumed until now.
By Stephanie Jucar Cooley • Unpacking • 9 mins
Thank you for reading this week’s issue. Hope you liked it. 😀
To our 11 new subscribers — including Lili, Ashley, Linda, Mari, Katina, Ridaa, Karina, Lelly, Durga, Ramesh, and Oz — I hope you find the newsletter a solid addition to your email inbox. To our long-time subscribers (Unique! Una! Uma!), you’re pretty great, too. Loyal reader Aaron, thank you for sharing the newsletter and getting the word out.
If you like Article Club, please help it grow. I really appreciate your support. Here are two ways you can help out:
❤️ Become a paid subscriber, like Molly (thank you). If you’ve subscribed for free for a long time, and you appreciate the articles and author interviews, or if you’ve joined one or more discussions, I encourage you to take the leap. You’ll join an esteemed group of readers who value the mission of Article Club. Plus you’ll receive surprise perks and prizes. It’s $5 a month or $36 a year.
📬 Invite your friends to subscribe. Know someone who’s kind, thoughtful, and loves to read? I’d love it if you encouraged them to subscribe. Word of mouth is by far the best way to strengthen our reading community. Thank you for spreading the word.
On the other hand, if you no longer want to receive this newsletter, please feel free to unsubscribe. See you next Thursday at 9:10 am PT.